


Hanging Out With The Boys

by toastedpbandj



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Blow Jobs, Bulges (Homestuck), Cuddling & Snuggling, Dry Humping, Fluff, Multi, Napping, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Quadrant Blurring, Smut, Threesome - F/M/M, Voyeurism, chubby!Karkat, chubby!reader, fully automated luxury polyamorous space time communism, gamzee is a good boy, you're kind of a little clown
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 10:28:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19868098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toastedpbandj/pseuds/toastedpbandj
Summary: All characters are 18+ years or 8.31+ sweeps... haha. Bet no ones made that joke before...





	Hanging Out With The Boys

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic, please go easy on me! ;-;

You’ve been asking Karkat to come hang out with Gamzee with you for awhile now. He makes hanging out with his own friends sound like it’s more of a task than anything. But you’ve finally convinced him to tag along to spend the night with you and Gamzee. You both arrive at Gamzee’s hive at the same time. You knock on the door and then push it open slowly, peeking in before opening it any further. 

KARKAT: WILL YOU FUCKING GET INSIDE BEFORE I CHANGE MY MIND ABOUT THIS?

Karkat is frustrated by your timidness and pushes you aside, grumbling, swinging open the door and going in. You follow him in. It’s pitch black in here. Karkat flicks on a light and you see that Gamzee is curled up, sleeping on the bean bag chair... it’s pretty cute. You walk over to him but Karkat stops you by grabbing your shoulder.

KARKAT: LET ME WAKE HIM.

He grabs a horn from the horn pile and holds it in front of Gamzee’s face. 

YOU: uh. Karkat you’ll-

HONK. Gamzee jolts awake.

YOU: scare him... /:

You punch Karkat in the arm.

GAMZEE: UgH.... mY mOtHeRfUcKiN hEaD hUrTs.

You punch Karkat again harder.

KARKAT: WHAT?! ):<

YOU: shithead. 

KARKAT: FUCK YOU. 

GAMZEE: wHoA nOw.... WhEn DiD y’AlL gEt HeRe? SoRrY, a BrOtHeR wAs AlL uP iN gEtTiN’ hIs NaP oN aNd ShIt... I mUsT’vE mIsSeD yOuR cAlL. 

KARKAT: NOBODY CALLED. SHE APPARENTLY JUST COMES OVER UNINVITED. SORRY GAMZEE, I SHOULD REALLY TEACH HER SOME FUCKING MANNERS. 

YOU: shut up, Karkat...

Gamzee yawns and stretches. You sit next to him and lean into his side, and he hugs you.

GAMZEE: NaH mAn... DoN’t WoRrY aBoUt It. ShE cAn CoMe OvEr WhEnEvEr. DoN’t NeEd No MoThErFuCkIn InViTaTiOn To CoMe SeE mE.

You hold Gamzee close. Karkat sits down in the other bean bag and pulls out his phone. You kiss Gamzee’s cheek and then realize his makeup is smeared across his face. You press your lips together and can taste his makeup. You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand and then pat him.

YOU: we should fix you up, big guy.

Gamzee smiles at you and then looks at Karkat endearingly. Karkat looks up.

KARKAT: *WE?* HA! YOU REALLY DON’T GET HOW THIS SHIT WORKS DO YOU?

YOU: ???

KARKAT: BEING A MOIRAIL IS A ONE PERSON JOB AND HE MIGHT AS WELL BE YOURS NOW. YOU TAKE CARE OF HIM.

YOU: oh good! 

You cup his face with both your hands and press your noses together.

YOU: did you hear that? you’re all mine! 

GAMZEE: hOnK! :o)

YOU: yes! hOnK! :o) 

KARKAT: ... THIS IS GROSS. 

YOU: I’m ignoring you. >:o( 

KARKAT: WHEN ARE YOU NOT IGNORING ME? 

YOU: oh please... 

KARKAT: NO SERIOUSLY. YOU’RE CONSTANTLY IGNORING ME. ALL THE FUCKING TIME, I- 

You’ve stopped listening to him now. You’re wiping Gamzee’s makeup off while making funny faces at him by scrunching up your face and sticking your tongue out. He chuckles softly every time. Once you’re done wiping off the makeup that was caked onto Gamzee’s cute little face you turn around to throw away all the wipes you’ve used and get something to comb Gamzee’s hair with. Karkat’s still going. 

KARKAT: BOTH OF YOU! YOU’RE FUCKING PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER. LIKE WHAT THE *FUCK* ARE YOU DOING? PRETENDING I DON’T SEE YOU TWO CHUCKLEFUCKS MAKING LUDICROUS FACES AT EACH OTHER AND LAUGHING LIKE YOU’RE FUCKING NEWLY HATCHED WRIGGLERS? I COULD LITERALLY THROW UP. I WILL SPEW CHUNKS AND VISCERA EVERYWHERE LIKE SOME KIND OF SICKENING PUKE GEYSER. AND YOU’RE STILL NOT LISTENING TO ME! HELLO? **ALTERNIA TO CLOWNS?!** I THINK I’M SICK.

You kiss Karkat on the forehead as you walk by him, and leave the room to get a comb. Karkat is so loud you can still hear him.

KARKAT: DO I JUST NOT EXIST ANYMORE? IS THIS HELL? IS THAT IT? BECAUSE YOU’D THINK THE LONGER I KEPT GOING THE MORE SOMEONE WOULD FUCKING PAY ATTENTION TO ME!

You come back with a comb and a spray bottle for Gamzee’s hair. You spray Karkat in the face. (It’s just water.) He recoils and makes a noise you can only describe as something of shock and disgust.

KARKAT: **KCRSHSJ WTF?!!!** ):<

YOU: Gamzee... will you give Karkat some attention while I do your hair. 

GAMZEE: AnYtHiNg FoR yOu, MaMa.

You put a hand on Karkat’s shoulder. 

KARKAT: NO. ):<

YOU: you want attention. you literally just admitted that to practically the whole planet with your loud mouth. come sit with us. 

Karkat sighs and gets up. He sits next to Gamzee on the floor and crosses his arms, hunched over and pouting like a child. Gamzee puts an arm around his shoulders and pulls him close.

GAMZEE: hEy BuDdY. :o) 

KARKAT: GAMZEE... 

GAMZEE: YoU dOiNg OkAy? 

KARKAT: ... 

GAMZEE: AwWw MaN.... WhAt’S bOtHeRiNg Ya? CaN i HeLp A bRoThEr OuT? 

KARKAT: I CAN’T TALK ABOUT IT... 

GAMZEE: sUrE yOu CaN. yOu CaN tElL mE aNyThInG. i AiN’t GoNnA tElL nObOdY. i KnOw YoU... aNd HoW yOu lIkE tO gEt ThInGs OfF yOuR mOtHeRfUcKiN cHeSt. Karkat leans into his side. You start combing Gamzee’s adorable curls, standing behind the two of them. 

KARKAT: NOT IN FRONT OF HER... 

GAMZEE: Oh... 

KARKAT: YEAH. 

GAMZEE: (we could whisper about it all motherfuckin quiet and shit...) 

KARKAT: (no gamzee.) 

GAMZEE: (you could... text it to me) 

KARKAT: ...YEAH. OKAY. 

GAMZEE: (cool.) 

KARKAT: YOU CAN STOP WHISPERING, DUMBASS 

GAMZEE: (heh... whatever you say, brother) 

KARKAT: OH MY FUCKING GOD.... 

It’s quiet for awhile. You’re not sure if they’re talking about you or if you should be concerned... but you decide to let it slide. You know at least Gamzee loves you. You comb through all of Gamzee’s hair and then braid it. It’s a pretty but simple braid that comes to his shoulder blades. By the time you’re done with all that they’re about done texting. You see Karkat put his phone in his pocket. 

KARKAT: THANKS... 

GAMZEE: yOu FeEl BeTtEr? 

KARKAT: YEAH... 

You sit on the other side of Karkat now that you’re done taking care of Gamzee. Gamzee plays with the curls at the end of his braid. Karkat looks at Gamzee and then at you.

KARKAT: YOU’RE..... BETTER AT THIS THAN I WAS SO FAR... SORRY GAMZEE. 

GAMZEE: It’S aLl GoOd, BrO. :o) 

You sit up tall and smile. A proud moirail.

KARKAT: HE NEEDS SOMEONE WITH MORE PATIENCE THAN ME ANYWAY. 

YOU: that’s okay. 

KARKAT: ...YEAH. 

You hug Karkat. He sighs and settles down between you and Gamzee. You all squish against each other on the floor. You and Karkat sit in silence and listen to Gamzee hum. You can’t figure out what he’s humming exactly but it sounds familiar. His low voice is incredibly soothing. Karkat’s struggling to keep his eyes open. You can feel yourself slowly falling asleep too. You all end up falling asleep on each other. Waking up from your nap you are laying on each other in a row like fallen dominos. Karkat is still asleep purring away, his head on Gamzee’s chest. But Gamzee is awake staring at the ceiling. He’s got a hand on Karkat’s forehead rubbing his horn with his thumb. You lift your head from Karkat’s chest and sit up, rubbing your eyes. Karkat clicks in his sleep and reaches for you, his face scrunched up in distress. As you lay back down on him, his clicks turn back into purrs. Gamzee softly laughs at the two of you. Gamzee’s laugh is so cute. Time passes while you lay there for awhile.

GAMZEE: ... uUuHh. 

YOU: hmm? 

GAMZEE: I cAn’T... fEeL mY lEgS.... 

YOU: oh. we’ll get off you! 

Still on the floor, you sit up again and slide off Karkat. Karkat is now half awake, not fully cognizant of what’s happening. Because he treats you like his personal teddy bear, he follows you as you move to scoot off of Gamzee. You let Karkat pull you back into him, and this time he almost pulls you beneath him, half laying on you. Thankfully he isn’t fully laying on his stomach so you’re not completely smooshed by him. Just comfortably smooshed... You catch yourself running your hands up and down his chest. Karkat has both his arms around your waist and a leg between yours. Gamzee curls up beside Karkat, snuggling close to him. He puts a hand on Karkat’s hip. You and Gamzee both subconsciously decide to indulge in a little Karkat love session. You kiss him, and he kisses you back even though he’s obviously half asleep. Gamzee’s hand slips beneath Karkat’s clothes and he rubs his side. This causes Karkat to lean back into Gamzee, who takes the opportunity to grind hips against Karkat, and slide his hand further towards the front of Karkat’s waistline. Karkat starts to fully wake up. He pulls you into him more and presses his leg against you harder, making you squirm a little. You slide your hands under his shirt and continue to rub his chest. He lets out a breathy moan against your lips. Chills run down your spine and you bite his bottom lip. You all spend awhile in your adorable pile of breathless sensual pleasures. You’re all aimlessly fondling each other, and peeling various articles of clothes that get in the way of each other's hands. Eventually you and Gamzee are both dry humping Karkat, who’s been hiding his face in the crook of your neck and softly moaning. You’ve got your arms wrapped around him in a hug now to effectively grind against him and his leg. Karkat’s physical frame is so thick and square and you love him. Gamzee has been able to slowly pull you both closer to him causing Karkat to be really sandwiched between you. Gamzee slips his hand further down the front of Karkat's hips, to feel him up. Karkat’s muscles tense and he gasps. “F-fuck... nnh... Gamzee…” Karkat sighs. Holy fuck, this is adorable. Karkat fidgets, “Gamzee.... hhhf... w.. we shouldn't.... we’re n-not... aahh-” Gamzee tries to reassure him “Ssshhhh... it don’t matter.....” he says. “Mmn..but Gamzee…” Karkat protests. “Stop worryin’ so much... let a motherfucker help his bro unwind... don’t make it complicated. Focus on that sweet lil lady you’re holdin’ onto.” “O-okay…” mutters Karkat. He lifts his head from your neck and looks at you through half lidded eyes. You put your hand on his cheek, he’s so warm and his face is still completely flushed. You lean into him and he kisses you on the nose. You giggle softly at him and he smiles just a little bit. You kiss him again and he moans against your lips. His grip on you tightens just a little. He breathes hard as you kiss his neck. “Hhh... guys..i can’t..... mm.. i can’t take much more of this…” Karkat sighs. You both stop. “That’s okay.” you tell him. You put your head against Karkat’s chest. He’s still holding you. He rolls over with you in his arms and flops you between him and Gamzee. “Here... she’s all yours.” Karkat mumbles. “Aww... :o)” Gamzee says, taking you into his arms. Gamzee’s hands aren’t warm and smooth like Karkat’s but that’s okay. He runs his hands up and down your body, lingering in certain places, squishing and playing with you, not leaving a part of you untouched. He kisses your neck and for some reason it tickles a little. You smile and squirm. Karkat is watching you, blushing still. “Taking notes on how to treat a lady, Karkat?” you tease. You and Gamzee notice the way Karkat’s gawking at the two of you. You decide to give him a closer look, shifting positions and climbing on top of him and straddling his waist. Gamzee shifts so he’s right behind you. Gamzee runs a hand up your shirt to fondle your breasts and ends up showing off your tummy. The way Karkat stares at you makes you feel very pretty. His cute dumb face is redder than ever. Gamzee pulls your hips against his to grind on you, “ffuck…” he says under his breath. Without any warning, he pushes you down over Karkat, and you fall a little but catch yourself with your arm near Karkat’s head and a hand on his chest. Gamzee pushes his tentacle all the way inside you. You wince and grab Karkat's shoulder. “Gamzee... be gentle with her…” he cautioned. But you don’t think he’s listening. He continues to be not so gentle with you, thrusting in and out of you slow but hard. You whimper and hold onto Karkat. He bites his lip and starts touching himself while watching you. You lean down to rest your head on Karkat’s shoulder while being fucked from behind, muffling the sounds you make by tucking your face into Karksat's neck, each time his hips make contact with you. Gamzee only gives you a few moments before grabbing your waist and pulling you back onto all fours to push deeper inside you. He makes a really cute groan and leans over your back. You can’t help but moan when he starts to move his hips again, faster than before. But your arms are trembling and you start to feel weak. “Hhhh... mm Gamzee…” you murmur. He slows down trying to make it easier for you to speak. “Gamzee I... hhh” you pause to catch your breath. It’s still hard to talk, especially with Gamzee still inside you and Karkat hanging onto every word beneath you as if he were watching a movie. You can tell he’s a little concerned when you whimper too much or Gamzee thrusts into especially hard but he’s too aroused to do anything. “Maybe you’re being to rough w-” Karkat tries to say. Gamzee aggressively clicks at Karkat, and he shuts up immediately. “Let her finish…” Gamzee says impassively. Karkat nods, seeming intimidated but certainly not enough to stop jerking off. “I can’t... hh-hold myself up…” you stutter. “Oh... sorry babe. I got ya.” He wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you up so you’re both on your knees. “This good?” he asks. “Yeah…” You lean back against him for support as he continues to fuck you, hard. You hold onto his arm. Karkat touches your thigh. “H-holy ffuck…” he sighs. It’s nice to know he’s enjoying himself. Your head is spinning and you lay a hand on Gamzee’s neck. His skin is hot. He licks and kisses the back of your neck and your ear, you shiver and moan. He thrusts into you a few more times before slowing down and pulling out. You both exhale in unison, exhausted. Karkat has made a mess all over himself and looks horribly embarrassed, red cum on his stomach and a little on his thighs. Gamzee nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck and purrs. He isn’t done... but putting on a little show for the cuck who’s practically melting between your legs right now is one hell of a workout. After a moment you get off of Karkat. He’s covering his blushing face with his arm. You lift his arm off his face, to reveal Karkat giving you a look of guilt. You and Gamzee snicker lovingly at him. He sits up and huffs, looking up at Gamzee, who’s slowly rubbing himself with one hand. He’s moved so his dick is level with Karkat’s face. His tentacle brushes itself against Karkat’s cheek. Karkat clicks as if he’s irritated but puts his hand over Gamzee’s and takes the whole thing into his mouth. His eyes are shut as he concentrates, and he collapses a little, whimpering. You decide to make yourself useful and crawl between Karkat’s legs to lick the mess off his stomach and thighs. He moans with Gamzee’s dick in his mouth and reaches up to put his hands on Gamzee’s hips. Gamzee is using Karkat’s horns like little nubby handles. Taking a closer look, Karkat’s tummy is really cute. Especially covered in his own cum. Gamzee and Karkat are both making some super cute noises above your head, and you feel him tense up a little bit at times, moaning even more onto Gamzee’s dick when you lick him. Karkat can apparently handle Gamzee with minimal choking. Good for him. By the time you’re done cleaning up Karkat and have given his tummy and thighs a few hickeys and many kisses, Karkat is swallowing pretty much everything Gamzee has to offer. The excess trails in purple rivulets from the corner of his mouth and drips from his jaw. Gamzee pulls out and Karkat turns away from him, coughing and wiping his face. Gamzee practically collapses back into the bean bag chair, face down, and Karkat tries to catch his breath.

KARKAT: JESUS... FUCKING......... SHIT. UGHHHH.... 

Karkat looks down at you, you’re laying on his stomach. He pats your head. You all have a moment to collect yourselves and put your clothes back on before getting up again. You get up first and go sit on Gamzee, who’s still laying face down in the bean bag chair. You sit on his butt and rub his back and shoulders. Gamzee sighs.

GAMZEE: HoLy... MoThEr oF fUcK..... dAmN tHaT fEeLs GoOd. 

YOU: hehehehehe! :o) 

GAMZEE: sHiIiIiT....... lEmMe TrY.

You get off Gamzee. He picks you up and sits you on the couch. You switch back and forth massaging each other a few times while giggling like little girls at a sleepover.

GAMZEE: BrO... yOu GoTtA gEt In On ThIs. 

YOU: karkat probably needs it more than the two of us. look at him. 

GAMZEE: hAhA hOnK... YOU: so tense... and he stays so rigid... always. 

GAMZEE: YeAh... YOU: karkat relax your shoulders, buddy. it’s okay! :3 

KARKAT: CAN YOU TWO STOP MAKING FUN OF ME? >:( 

YOU: I’m just teasing you!

Karkat looks at you... well it’s actually more of a glare. He glares at you.

YOU: come here, big guy! lemme take care of you too!

You pat the spot on the couch next to you.

KARKAT: I’D PREFER IF THE BOTH OF YOU NEVER TOUCHED ME AGAIN... THANKS. 

YOU: suit yourself. but... when your shoulders get stuck up there by your ears don’t come crying to me! 

GAMZEE: :o( tHaT’lL bE sO sAd wHeN tHaT hApPeNs... 

YOU: yeah... it will be Gam. 

KARKAT: STFU. THAT’S NOT SOMETHING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE. 

YOU: I dunno. happened to my grandpa... 

GAMZEE: WhAt’S a gRaNdPa? 

KARKAT: IT’S THE MOTHERGRUB THAT GIVES BIRTH TO YOUR LUSUS. 

YOU: that is... not at all how I explained it to you, but we can go with that I guess. 

GAMZEE: wHoA. dId ThAt ReAlLy HaPpEn tO yOuR gRaNdPa? 

YOU: yep. and he couldn’t fix it. it looked like he had no neck for the rest of his life. 

GAMZEE: PoOr mOtHeRfUcKeR... :o( 

You're totally making this up on the spot, but Gamzee genuinely believes you.

YOU: yeah. my “lusus” taught me the importance of backrubs so that it never happened to me. 

GAMZEE: oOoHhH.

Karkat sits down next to both of you.

KARKAT: OKAY FINE. ):<

YOU: yay!!! :3 

KARKAT: JUST... FOR A LITTLE WHILE. 

YOU: whatever you’re comfortable with, baby boy.

You push his shoulders down into a normal posture.

YOU: you have to relax Karkat... 

KARKAT: RIGHT. 

YOU: are you capable of relaxing on your own? 

KARKAT: SHUT UP... /:<

You kiss his neck and then start to rub his back for him. His muscles are incredibly tense though and you have to apply more pressure than you do to Gamzee. He starts to relax though. Which is nice to see.

KARKAT: .....OH. 

YOU: not so bad? lemme know if I’m pushing too hard. 

KARKAT: YEAH. OKAY...

You spend a little while trying to work the knots out of Karkat’s shoulders but he sits there quietly and purrs. Gamzee sits behind you and traces your figure through your shirt. After awhile your hands start to hurt, and you tell Karkat you’ll have to stop for now. He’s okay with that and sleepily leans back into the couch. You snuggle into Gamzee’s side and look around his hive for a bit. It’s the same as always. Hard candies are suck in the carpet... The bean bags, the long couch, the pile of blankets, the pile of horns... etc. Except there’s something new this time in the corner by the horn pile. It’s Gamzee’s juggling pins. You’ve never seen them before, or anything like them in general.... You wanna touch em. They’re colorful and shiny and you gotta get your hands on em.

GAMZEE: WhAtcHa LoOkIn’ aT? :o) 

YOU: oh... those. You point at the pins. 

KARKAT: ...GAMZEE YOU REALLY SHOULDN’T LEAVE THOSE LAYING AROUND LIKE THAT. 

YOU: can we play with them? 

GAMZEE: uHhH... 

KARKAT: ):<

GAMZEE: PrObAbLy Be BeSt tO... uM... nOt PlAy wItH tHoSe MoThErFuCkErS... 

YOU: awww... ): 

GAMZEE: sOrRy LiL mAmA... sOmE tOyS aRe JuSt fOr DaDdY. 

YOU: okay. 

GAMZEE: MaYbE lAtEr I cAn ShOw YoU a TrIcK. :o) 

YOU: ooh yeah!!

You yawn and lay your head down on Gamzee’s lap, he pets your head. Your feet touch Karkat’s thigh and he tries to push them off the couch multiple times but you just put them right back. Eventually he just lays down with you, using your butt as a pillow.

YOU: i love you both... 

GAMZEE: aWwW... i lOvE y’AlL tOo. 

KARKAT: UM... ME TOO.


End file.
